希望的観測死 || Death by Wishful Thinking

Doubt希望的観測死
kibouteki kansoku shi
Death by Wishful Thinking

Vocals: Ranko
Lyrics: Ranko
Composed by: Comp
Album: Doubt (ダウト) 【Official Site】
Circle: Butaotome (豚乙女)
Event: C86

Requested by: Tegamin

According to Tegamin, this track is the third in a series of tracks (starting from ‘Billiard’) with 的 ‘teki’ as their third kanji. The lyrics are by Ranko (for a change) and since Ranko is apparently a fujoshi, they mainly deal with homosexual love, and that sort of stuff. Also, the formatting of this song is weird, but it matches the formatting of the lyrics booklet. I used this sign to emphasise the full stops. I also kept the commas consistent with the original text, though it isn’t sung that way. So basically, I ignored the rules of punctuation. I’m sorry…

So, I basically think that this track is about a guy (evident by his use of the boy-ish 僕) with unrequited feelings for someone else. Their gender isn’t specified, but based on what we know about Ranko, we can assume they’re a guy as well. From what I can gather, there are three elements to the song – the ‘present’ (indicated by the more poetic long sentences with a lack of punctuation), the ‘past’ (attempts made by the speaker to talk to or think about his crush, indicated by the frequent commas), and his recurring thoughts of “I wonder if it’s okay, for me to try dying.” So, though the song sounds like it’s all sunshine and rainbows, it’s actually dark. Really dark. I don’t know how it ends – hopefully he talks to someone he trusts and is able to move on – but I’ll leave that to your imagination. Anyway, sorry for the long-winded interpretation (though an interpretation was kind of requested along with the song >_>)

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

微かに切れる夜を攫って、
どこかの街に置き去りにして、
蝶々が跳ねる肌を滑って、
奇跡の先を薄く捩って。
君の、言葉に、惑わされても、
それが、嬉しい、愚かな僕さ、
世界の、真ん中、君しか映らない。
僕の声、君には聞こえない、
夜の帳突き抜け、
君がもし、僕に笑いかけるならば。
死んでみてもいい、かなあ。
やがて千切れる朝に触って、
捨て去る影にさめざめ泣いて、
知らずに哂う誰かの背に、
惨めさだけが勢いづいて。
君の、言葉を、暴力的に、
想い、患い、助けて欲しい、
世界は、壊れて、君だけが笑うよ。
僕の歌、君には届かない、
朝の靄に包まれ、
君がもし、僕に気付かないのならば。
死んでみてもいい、かなあ。
夢に見る、君と僕と二人、
同じ、ものに、なれたら。
僕の声、君には聞こえない、
夜の帳突き抜け、
君がもし、僕に笑いかけるならば。
死んでみてもいい、かなあ。

kasuka ni kireru yoru wo saratte,
doko ka no machi ni okizari ni shite,
chouchou ga haneru hada wo subette,
kiseki no saki wo usuku sujitte
kimi no, kotoba ni, madowasarete mo,
sore ga, ureshii, oroka na boku sa,
sekai no, mannaka, kimi shika utsuranai.
boku no koe, kimi ni wa kikoenai,
yoru no tobari tsukinuke,
kimi ga moshi, boku ni waraikakeru naraba.
shinde mite mo ii, ka naa.
yagate chigireru asa ni sawatte,
sutesaru kage ni samezame naite,
shirazu ni warau dareka no se ni,
mijime sa dake ga ikioizuite.
kimi no, kotoba wo, bouryokuteki ni,
omoi, wazurai, tasukete hoshii,
sekai wa, kowarete, kimi dake ga warau yo.
boku no uta, kimi ni wa todokanai,
asa no moya ni tsutsumare,
kimi ga moshi, boku ni kizukanai no naraba.
shinde mite mo ii, ka naa.
yume ni miru, kimi to boku to futari,
onaji, mono ni, naretara.
boku no koe, kimi ni wa kikoenai,
yoru no tobari tsukinuke,
kimi ga moshi, boku ni waraikakeru naraba.
shinde mite mo ii, ka naa.

I run off with that slightly broken-up evening,
And abandon it in some alley,
Butterflies slide across my jumping skin,
It’s a weak parody of the moment before a miracle.
Even if, I’m bewildered, by your words,
Well actually, I’m happy – hah, I’m so stupid,
Only you, are reflected, in the middle of, my world.
You can’t hear, my voice,
But if you were to, smile at me,
It would pierce through, the veil of darkness.
I wonder if it’s okay, for me to try dying.
Before long, I am touched by the torn-off morning,
I sorrowfully cry in a cast-off shadow,
On the back of some person who sneers at me whilst I’m unaware,
And only my misery gathers strength.
I think violently, of your, words,
No, they make me, violently ill – please save me,
The world, is broken, and only you are smiling.
My song, won’t reach you,
But if you were to, take no notice of me,
I’d be wrapped up in the morning mist.
I wonder if it’s okay, for me to try dying.
I saw it in a dream, you and I together,
We had, become, one.
You can’t hear, my voice,
But if you were to, smile at me,
It would pierce through, the veil of darkness.
I wonder if it’s okay, for me to try dying.

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